On Friendship: Part 2 or 3

Old Friends...

I started talking about them in Part 1, but I tried to focus. Now, let me tell you something about old friends: there are no better people in the world. For me, my old friends are the most important people in the world to me. If you're one of my many, many family members, don't think that you're excluded from this category, because you aren't.



Let me start by giving a little insight... When I was in primary and secondary school, I moved around a lot. My parents had this philosophy of 'whatever is best this year' or at least I thought they did. I may have created this in my own mind to try and make sense of switching schools so much, but I'm pretty sure it was real. Anyways, I got good at making friends quickly but I was terrible at keeping them once I moved onto a different school. Just a run down... Kindergarten - 2nd I was at Rainbow, 3rd I was at Ralston, 4th-6th I was at Machesney, 7th-8th I was at Keith, 9th - 10th I was at Boylan and 11th - 12th I was at RCS. That's a fairly high number of changes but I always adjusted well. The problem for me was once I left one school I didn't keep in contact with my best friends from the previous. I mean can you really blame me? I was young and I hadn't acquired the skills of the art and appreciation of friendship. The switch between Boylan and RCS I could have done better at, but that switch was for 'other' reasons and at the time I thought it was probably best to sever ties. Anyways, its amazing how I've changed. Now I find it very hard to make new friends and even harder to let old ones go. I don't know if I woke up one day and I was different or if I was slowly maturing. Who really cares?

Since being away, I've though a lot about those old friends. Especially my friends from RCS and from LFC. I've thought a lot about how even though I only had 2 years with them, they've shaped me and changed me and created in me different desires. I've also thought about the old friends that I've made in isolated situations, like when I was abroad in Prague and when I worked in Colorado for the summer. What's interesting is that in a lot of ways those friends are similar to my Quito friends, but for me, something is intrinsically different. I think its because a) I was younger b) I was by myself and c) we all had a finite time in Prague and in Colorado which in someway strengthened our friendships immediately.

Old friends get you. There's much less explaining with old friends and much more talking and listening. The pretense is gone. Sweats are ok. Movies and pizza and a bottle of wine make for the best night in ever with old friends. You can cry in front of old friends; you can have the hard conversations; you can argue; you can celebrate the most intimate of moments. The old friends are the best types of friends.

There is a group of girls from RCS whom I will always consider three of my nearest and dearest friends. Things have gotten in the way of our daily contact and we don't have sleepovers anymore but it doesn't matter. The same is true with my friends from LFC. There's slightly more than three of them, but they will always, always, always be considered my closest friends. And I think one of the defining factors of an old friendship like this is that you can pick up after days, weeks, months of not speaking and continue on.

I wish that I was better at staying in touch with my old friends. I wish that I called more and emailed more and sent actual letters more. And to be honest, I wish that they called more and they emailed more and they sent actual letters more. And I wish that we could still have sleepovers, go out for drinks on a Thursday night, or talk about every minute detail of our existences together. But the reality is that we're older and we're busier and we have other people in our lives... significant others, roommates, spouses. But it doesn't matter. Because old friends can always pick up and old friends always want more but they also understand the constraints of everyday life. And that's what I love about them the most.

So here's to all the old friends out there... here, here!

MULUB,
Taylor